On a sunny Sunday afternoon in June, 1980-something, I was helping my mother change the sheets on her bed. I was in my early teens. Local news was covering the NYC Pride Parade and my mother turned to me, made a limp-wrist gesture and said, “Why do they need to flaunt it?” She continued, “I…
Tag: mental health
Women’s History Month: Healing and Anger
Adam and I have often spoken about how one of our goals is to amplify voices that may not be heard. Which kind of obligates us to address the fact that March is Women’s History Month. I’ve had a note in our 2 Rules calendar about Women’s History Month for a while, but it just…
Potential (Caturday Questions)
Little Cat is 17 years old. Things have gotten to the point where he has considered retiring from his job of periodically running away from home and scaring the crap out of Human-Mom. It’s bittersweet. He’s very good at his job. And he obviously loves it. But like so many consummate professionals, he’ll probably retire…
Revise, Review, Revisit…and Welcome
Hello World Hello and welcome. And if you’re new here, perhaps you have come to visit after hearing us on the Master of None podcast, we’re glad you’re here. If you haven’t heard the podcast, give it a listen. Adam and Erika had the chance to sit down with Cheryl Woodhouse, who hosts Master of…
“Rape” is Just a Four-Letter Word
I don’t want to talk about about rape today. Or any day. March 21 is World Poetry Day. I love reading poetry. I love writing poetry. And six of my last seven columns have been on intense topics: Consent, “Don’t Say Gay” laws, criminalizing gender affirmation, Nazis, and Ukraine. I could use a break. We…
Oyster Sauce Gravy Wingettes: Childhood Memories
It should go without much dispute: for many people, our eating preferences came from the kitchen which our moms didn’t let us enter. The kitchen, soaked in lemon yellow sunlight late in the afternoon, or glowing fluorescent white in the evening, speaks magic. Dish after dish of vegetables and meat filled our grumbling stomachs; brought…
Consent: Changing the Conversation
Rape and sexual assault can happen to anyone regardless of gender identity or gender presentation. Likewise, issues of consent can apply to anyone. One of the things that I struggled with as I was writing this is the very binary way in which everything I read and watched during my research fell into an either/or…
Bangalore Letters #1
It doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue, does it? But “Bangalore Briefs” sounds a bit like a legal service or a clothing store that specializes in undies. And “Bangalore Bulletin” just sounds official in a way this will not be. Best not to overthink it. The Story So Far For those of you who have…
Affirming Gender is not a Crime
When I got pregnant with my first child, it seemed like the moment the stick had turned pink, the first thing people asked was: “Are you hoping for a boy or a girl?” When I was far enough along to know what I was having, that question became: “Are you having a boy or a…
COVID: An Essay
One of my favorite authors, Michel de Montaigne, put the name “essais,” to a genre of literature that is at least as old as the Roman Republic. The word means “attempts.” The idea is that the literary work does not need to follow a set form, but rather could follow the workings of the human…