Colonel Edward Thomas Ryan died in June 2024, during Pride month. His obituary was shared with me by a friend who, like Colonel Ryan, lives in upstate New York. While I didn’t know Colonel Ryan, I saw in his words a man who lived a brave life and, in death, chose even more bravery: coming…
Tag: homophobia
Pride is for… ?
I began June not with celebration, but with tears. “Happy” Pride, right? Who the fuck thought I would be watching a TV show with a character who was wearing overalls and I would absolutely breakdown in tears? And now, I’m alternating between writing and ugly crying. And the makeup I put on earlier today is a mess…
All I Want for Hannukah is to Keep a Little Oil in the Tank
Some parts of this piece have been percolating for a bit. There are a lot of things here that are just always gnawing at the back of my mind, waiting for the right story to come together for me to share. In fact, I even thought about writing it last week, but the truth is,…
World AIDS Day: A Tale of Two Pandemics
In the time of AIDS, when condom use was necessary… I am quoting John Ginoli, the founder of Pansy Division, the first openly gay punk band. Someone who had been at the forefront of the queercore movement in the 90s. It was on an episode of the podcast Out in the Bay that I listened…
Art and Trauma (Caturday)
Well. It happened again. At such times that tragedy touches a community that one of our own belongs to–a community that is a source of both strength and vulnerability–we make the following choice. Sometimes people who are grieving need to laugh. And sometimes they need to write about their feelings. So here’s the comic. Enjoy…
After “Don’t Say Gay” and “Stop Woke”
It’s October. We’re celebrating LGBTQ+ History Month. Two weeks ago we celebrated National Coming Out Day. We’re finally starting to feel as though autumn isn’t too far off. And kids have been back in school for a month or two already. They’re well on the way to thinking about their grades–report cards, tests, essays. Everything…
Bi+ Visibility is Cause for Celebration
Pride Month in June celebrates the entire LGBTQ+ community including bi+ people. There are some struggles unique to the bi+ community though, and September has been set aside to honor them. The month of September is Bi Visibility Month., which includes Bisexual Awareness Week is celebrated from September 16-23, and concludes with “Celebrate Bisexuality Day” on…
PrEP Under Threat
A judge in Texas recently ruled that a company with a religious founder does not have to pay (through its choice of insurance plans) for its employees to use Truvada or Descovy as PrEP (Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis against HIV). This is obviously part of a long list of recent legislative and judicial attacks on the rights…
Not Just a Phase?
I’ve written about the first time I kissed a girl. I’ve written about how much it would have meant to me to have queer role models. And I’ve written about why it was really important for me to have access to queer books as a teenager. I’ve never really talked about the “not just a…
Coming Out: That Lightbulb Moment
A note on language. This story about coming out is being told through the prism of memory. So the scenes that take place in the late ’80s and early ’90s contain some language that implies a gender-binary. We have allowed that language to stand to reflect the author’s understanding of the world in that era,…